I'm HOOKED!!

I didn't realize what I was getting into when I started reading Twilight. I finished it in 3 days! That's like 100 times faster than I've ever read anything unless it's Dr. Suess or something! I can't believe how GOOD it is!! I'm TOTALLY and COMPLETELY OBSESSED with these books now! I went straight out and got the second one within an hour of finishing the first and I've about finished it now too and I only got it yesterday! I have to admit I've been bad though. I haven't gotten anything done I need to since I'm so wrapped up in this book. I can't put it down! I'm lucky I could long enough to write this! Why didn't any of you make me read these sooner?! I was reading Brynnley's blog, and now I can't wait for the movie to come out in october. I feel kind of dumb being this obsessed over a book. I even dream about it!! Am I sick or what?!

Fine N' Fancy Free

I'm happy to announce that so far the tubes that Connor got have worked wonders! He's so much happier, and even though he doesn't sleep through the night still, he doesn't scream when he wakes up. Instead he whimpers and will go back to sleep in a few minutes if left alone. That makes things a bit easier for me. :) He has also developed a liking for drinking from a straw or one of those things you use to give him medicine.. I can't remember what they're called for some reason! Well, those thingy-ma-bobs. Anyway, he's doing great! Thanks for all of your support and love!

"Mom, I've had it rough today! You woke me up at 4:15 and made me drink a bottle. Then I couldn't sleep after so good, but it didn't matter because you came and made me get out of bed at 4:45! I didn't know what was going on! Then you and Nana take me to this strange place where this other girl kept screaming at me and it scared me mom! What did I do to her? Luckily Nana held me and made me feel better though. But that's not the worst part! I was getting tired and hungry and you wouldn't feed me anything! Why?? You know I can't sleep if I'm in a strange place and I'm hungry. But then, after a long long time you gave me to these strange men and they put this mask on my face and made me breath this gas. Mom! I can't remember anything they did to me! But when I woke up I felt sick and weird and you were gone! These people strapped things to my feet and kept telling me to hold still. I kept screaming and screaming for you but you weren't there! But then this nice lady went and got you and you came and held me and I started to feel better. Nana gave me crackers, and juice, and rocked me and everything was ok after that. But I gotta tell you mom.. when we got home I was sure glad to be there, but I still felt funny. I tried to nap, but I couldn't stay asleep for that long. My tummy feels kind of sick. I guess what I'm getting at is, if you'll just hold me and love me all day long, I won't feel as bad. Oh, and make sure I have my binky! Will you mom? I love you, and I just want to be with you when I don't feel good."

"Baby, I will hold you for as long as you let me. I will take care of you to the best of my abilities, and I'm so sorry things were so hard for you! I love you!"

*the tubes were put in successfully, and lets just hope they make him feel better!

Here We Go..

Bright (actually still dark) and EARLY tomorrow morning I'll be taking Connor to Primary Children's to get his tubes put in. He has to be there at 6am! This should be fun because that means I have to leave the house no later than 5. Ugh. I'm not looking forward to that.
On another note, I'd like to share that my cousin Josh on my dad's side is most likely getting married in May. So looks like we may have 2 weddings to go to. Hopefully Adam has his here! With the exception of his little sister Hannah who's barely 6, Josh is now the last of the cousins on my dad's side to get married. Like Adam is the last on my mom's! And both are getting married in May! What are the odds? I'm excited for both of them! I just think it's funny that Josh owes me 10 bucks now. I forgot about our bet, but when he got home from his mission, about a month later I was talking to him and I said just watch.. you'll be married or at least engaged in 6 months. He laughed and said "yeah right! I'm staying single for at least a couple years to finish school." I said I'll bet you 10 bucks you are! Well... HAHA JOSH!! I WAS RIGHT!! You so owe me 10 bucks! :)

Advice For The Clueless

Alex's real mom is pregnant. She's not married, she hasn't got a place of her own, no job, but she has chosen to keep the baby. When Alex first found out she was pregnant, she told her mom she didn't like it and didn't want her to have a baby (She also told John and I she didn't want us having another one ever either). Alex doesn't like "competition" in any way. Her mom at that point didn't know if she would keep it or not. Anyway, so she told us how it bothered her then. When Alex came home from being with her the weekend before last, she announced that Jessica was keeping the baby. This has really effected Alex in a negative way. She has been meaner, more insecure (mostly just going crazy when she's not with her dad), and over all harder to deal with. John and I both knew that if Jessica kept the baby it would sever a lot of ties with her and Alex. Alex has figured that out on her own. She remembers when her mom abandoned her for less. She actually even told John that even though her baby wasn't due for another month it'd be better to not plan things with Alex. Well, we have been trying to make her feel better about things. But Alex has bottled up her feelings and "pops" every now and then. Mostly just when her dad isn't around. How do we help her? We can't change the fact that Jessica will be around less. John and I actually are looking forward to it. But Alex, even though has openly told us that she doesn't like going with her mom, is still upset about being "replaced" in her mind. It's understandable to be upset about it. But despite me not wanting to admit it, Jessica has some good reasons for not taking Alex for a while after the baby's born. Alex just doesn't understand that. In her mind, if she can take care of a baby, why can't she take care of her? It's a good point. But Jessica has never been a good mom. One is almost too much for her to handle at a time. So we're back to square one. Alex is feeling rejected and hurt by her mom.. again, and we don't know how to help her this time. I'm not sure we really even can help her. This is something her mom should be helping her deal with. She needs to be reassuring Alex that she'll still be there for her. (Not like she really ever has been but Alex still needs to hear it.) Any suggestions for the clueless?

I Owe Thanks

I just wanted to say THANK YOU!! to my mom and Kortney for helping watch Connor while I work. This week has been hard because I've had to work every day. But Kortney and my mom have been so supportive and willing to help when I needed it. John hasn't been available to watch him since he's had a training class of some sort the past few days and still until saturday. I'm SOOO grateful for the help I've gotten so far though! THANK YOU!!!! Me going back to work wouldn't be possible without your help! And Kortney, thank you soooo much in advance for all the days I know you'll be helping me again in the morning!!! Mom, same to you! THANK YOU BOTH!! I love you guys!

Summer Time Blues

I'm having summer withdrawls today. Not just today actually, I have been for a few days. But I'm getting to the point where I'm tired of winter. I don't want it anymore. I can handle a few months of it, but then I want it to warm up again and turn into spring. I'm not a fan of cold! Yesterday coming out of work there was the worst wind chill blowing really hard and FREEZING! I thought I was going to freeze to death just trying to get to my car. It was cold anyway without the wind! I want it to be summer again so we can go camping, and hiking, and go sit in the park. I get really dry skin in the winter too, and no matter how much lotion I put on my hands are still dry and it even cracked in one spot. Yeah...I'm ready for summer now!

Training Day 1

I finished my first day of training today. It was so BORING! It was a lot slower then they anticipated it to be so there wasn't really anything for us to do. There's 4 of us training, and we just sat there most of the day. We did do a lot of bookwork, and I have a TON of homework to do for tomorrow. This is the worst part of working. I hate going through training. I wish I could just go in start taking tables, make my money and go. Well.. 1 down, 5 to go. Also, thank you mom for watching him while I was gone!

Baby Blues

I took Connor to the E.N. T. yesterday and it turns out "he's a good candidate for tubes". That's what the doctor said. So I scheduled a time, and little Connor will be having surgery to get tubes put in on the 25th. Wish him luck! It's just minor, and the whole thing takes maybe 15 minutes, but they still have to anesthetize him.

I Got It!

I got the job at Ruby River! Actually, it was cool because the manager pretty much just hired me on the spot. He said "you've got a lot of experience, I like your attitude. When can you start?" He was really nice. I can tell he's an easy person to talk to which will make working with him a lot easier too. It's too hard working for a place where you can't talk to your boss. That's how Famous Dave's was. I was criticized for asking my boss anything. He was such a jerk!
Orientation starts next weekend. I still need to work out the schedule for it as far as babysitters go. John can watch him at night and on weekends, and I can trade off with Kortney during the day I think. My mom can help sometimes too. During training it'll be a little more dificult because I have to train during the day for 5 days in a row. In most cases too I may not be done til 5pm. My manager said I can probably bring the baby to the last couple hours of training with me though. That's when we just sit and talk things over and one of the hostesses can watch him for a little bit usually. That's cool. My old boss would never tell me I could bring my baby in to work with me.
So this is going to be good! I'm excited to start and get out of the house once in a while!

Wish Me Luck!

I'm going in for a job interview today! I'm going for another serving position. It's easy, I know it, and you can make really good money if you go to the right place (which I am). I'm applying at Ruby River Steakhouse. I think it's time I got out of the house more, and had some time away a few days a week. Nothing major, just 2 or 3 days a week is all. It will be nice to have some of my own income again too. I hate having to ask John for money all the time! I really hope I get this! This is my first choice of places I wouldn't mind going back to work to. Plus, it's only temporary. I don't have to work full time if I don't want to. If things become too much for me and I want to stay home again I can. That's what's really nice about it. This is purely for me wanting to work. Not having to work.
On another note, I finally got my wish as far as Connor's ear infections were concerned. No, they haven't gone away and he has another one! But, his doctor (without me telling him) said that he needs tubes put in. They're finally going to do something about the problem!! I did make an appointment for the E.N.T already, and I had already anticipated that they would put them in once I talked to him. But hearing his regular doctor say he needs tubes just made me feel so much better. I guess I just needed to know both doctors thought the same thing.
Well, just a few hours until my interview! Wish me luck!

Back To Normal Life

Now that the holidays are over, things can finally settle down and get back to normal. Alex has started school again after being off for just over a month. John had to go back to work, and it's just me and Connor at home. I made an appointment to take him to an E.N.T next week. He's been not sleeping still, he won't take a bottle except at bed time, and it's obvious something is still wrong. Poor guy! He just can't catch a break!
As for my New Year resolutions, it's all pretty much home improvement. I want to remodel our kitchen (which I know might be a slim to none chance this year, but who knows). I want new counter tops and cabinets. Our counter has a big notch that's been broken off it and I don't like the color. It looks old and run down. I want granite or maybe a fake marble. Something classy. The cabinets look out dated too. I want a more modernized kitchen. It will really up the value of our home too when we decide to sell. Next, I want to put in a hot tub! We're already wired for it, we just need the goods! We also need to re-stain the deck, rip out the bushes in our backyard, prune our tree from the storm damage, and tear out the ugly rail road ties around our house and replace them with stone. I'm thinking we may not get everything done this year. Home improvement costs a lot depending on what you want done and I want a lot done. The yard stuff we can mainly do ourselves though. We'll see what happens I guess. I really want to get the bushes ripped out for sure. They are infested with spiders and they get in the house during the summer. YUCK!!! Well, wish us luck! What are all your resolutions?